Children put on a brave face, but divorce is rarely easy on children. Their emotions range from relief if one parent is emotionally or physically abusive, to fear they’ll lose one parent. Many children also worry that the divorce is their fault. You might no longer love your child’s other parent, but you still love you child. It’s time to learn how you can work together to reduce your child’s stress during your divorce.
Don’t Speak Ill of the Other Parent
Make it a goal to keep your problems to yourself and avoid angry behavior in front of your children. Kids can feel pulled back and forth between two sides, even without listening to your problems. Don’t speak ill of one another to the kids, and don’t speak ill of one another in front of the kids. They want you to love them, and hearing one of their parents express anger might make your children think you are angry with them. Don’t do anything that might encourage this belief.
Don’t Guilt Trip
Never make your child feel bad for spending time with his or her other parent. Ask about their time, show enthusiasm toward your child’s experience, and work together to ensure your kids are cared for no matter where they are. Your kids should never feel guilty spending time with their other parent. That kind of stress is unbearable for a child and can cause problems in your relationship.
Make it as Simple as Possible
Dragging out divorce proceedings creates a lot of stress for you, but the uncertainty is incredibly hard on your child. While it may be more expensive, hiring a divorce attorney can be more helpful for everyone involved. Many divorce attorneys, such as the Houston divorce attorneys at Tad Nelson & Associates offer free consultations.
Even if you have a good relationship with your child, they may have a hard time expressing their feelings about the divorce to you. They may worry that what they say will cause more problems for their parents, or that you don’t care. Showing love for your children is so important, but you should also consider therapy if your child is struggling with your divorce.
Divorce is never easy on kids, but it’s made especially difficult when parents cannot put their differences aside long enough to put their kids first. The best thing you can do for your child during a divorce is to maintain a positive co-parenting relationship. It’s the only way to ensure your child’s emotional wellbeing remains intact.