I love hearing about my kids, and their friends. It’s so funny, if you ask my youngest daughter everyone is her friend, but her two older sisters, Vayda and Catie are her BFF’s. Everything is so simple when you’re a toddler. Mattie has it all figured out, and she has taught me a lot as well. They are just so honest, and say it how they see it. In the mind of my toddler you be nice to everyone, and you have lots of friends. Sure she might get upset, but she will tell whoever she is upset with she is sorry. She also doesn’t hold on to anything, if her sister tells her she is sorry for something, Mattie quickly accepts and moves on. Really that’s similar to the way things should work even for adults, maybe without the childish games, but in my opinion we can learn so much from our kids regardless of how big or small they are. Kids are so smart, but the older they get, the more they are faced with life, and learning how to handle certain situations that come about.
I talk to my kids all the time, and Vayda and I have been talking about “frineds” a lot since she started back to school. She has been having a problem with a girl at school, who wants to play with her when she doesn’t have anyone else to play with. When she does have someone else to play with she is mean to Vayda, has even gone as far as stealing from the teacher and blaming it on Vayda. Thankfully the teachers knew what really happened, and my daughter was not caught up in that mess. Regardless it’s a hard place to be, and often confusing. I teach my kids to be nice and give everyone a chance, but now I have to take things a step further, and make things a little more confusing for her, because I also belive in standing up for yourself. I want my girls to be strong, and when/if the time comes that need to stand their ground I want them to do it with their head heald high. Fighting in my opinion is a last resort, there are plenty of other ways to stand up for yourself wihtout hurting somone.
Vayda finally realized that this girl is no her friends, because friends do not treat one another like this. She asked me if she had to be friends with this girl. My advice to her was not to be mean or rude, but to be nice from a distance. She doesn’t need to play with her at recess, or go out of her way to be sure she has someone to play with. She just needs to be nice, respectful, and be the bigger person who can forgive the little girl for what she has done and move on. Vayda has a big heart, and always wants to make sure people around her are happy. I think it was hard for her to understand that we can be nice, and not be best of friends with someone. Now she understands, realizes how important, and special her real friends are.
Teaching Young Children To Value Friendship With Books
It’s often hard to get kids to speak up when something is bothering them. Sure we can ask, but if they are not in the mood to share, too embarrassed to talk about it, or don’t realize it should be talked about it’s likely they will not bring it up, becasuse they would rather play, or finish their moives. The last thing I want to do is loose my line of communication with Vayda so I have had to get creative, and think of ways to get her to open up and talk about things that are going on in her life.
Vayda is a lot like I was growing up. She doesn’t bring her problems to the table, as a parent it’s my job to find a way to make her want to talk about things. I have learned books are a great way to spark a conversation with Vayda. I have been purchasing books that focus on resolving some type of problem, because she will ask me questions. Which ends up leading to a positive conversations, she is openenmided when we talk, and wants advice.
We recently read a really great kids book called A Little Book About Friendship. Which focuses on teaching young children how to build and maintain a happy and healthy friendship.
A Little Book about Friendship
A Little Book about Friendship is written by Samantha Kurtzman-Counter is a mother, children’s book author, children’s show producer and director, as well as President of The Mother Company. A Little Book about Friendship is an awesome book for children ages 3 to 6 years old, and it’s about 30 pages long. It’s a great book, and has helped Vayda open up and talk more about relationships she has at school.
In the children’s book A Little Book about Friendship you will find fun, hand-crafted characters, as well as lovely backgrounds, that are bright and fun. Vayda and Mattie loved the book from the start, which means they noticed the colorful backgrounds, and fun characters that they have not seen before. I’m not sure about you kids, but for mine to be drawn to a book it needs to be fun, and A Little Book about Friendship is defiantly fun from the moment you pull it out.
In the book kids go on a fun adventure to a playground where they meet with Louie the lamb, and Lionel the lion, who are one of a kind characters. Louie and Lionel are all about having a great time, sharing, caring, and want to be a good friend to one another. They even run into a problem and solve it together, and teach kids about forgiving their friends when they do something that upsets them.
A Little Book about Friendship is a fun tale for younger kids. It’s a book that they can relate to, and learn from. As a parent I appreciated the message the book sends out, and that it can be used as a useful tools for us to help teach our children how to build lasting friendships, and resolve conflict properly. I also enjoy the conversation it sparked between Vayda and I. She had questions about a little girl at school who she has been friends with for several years, and an issue they were having. The book helped her see that maybe she needed to say sorry, because she did value their friendship, and she cares about her friend.
Maddie noticed the serious conversation Vayda and I were having, and started to ask questions. She told Vayda she was sorry for taking her Barbie and hiding it, lol. She said that she wanted to be a good best friend to Vayda. Which helped Vayda see how much her little sister loves, and looks up to her. It’s moments like this that I live for… I seriously wanted to cry when my two younger girls gave each other a hug, and Vayda began to cry a little because she realized how much her little sister loves her. Vayda told me she knew she loved Mattie, but never realized how good of friends they were. Vayda told Mattie that she was her BEST, BEST, BESTIE in the whole wide world, and Mattie grinned from ear to ear. Hearing her big sister say that was music to her ears. She also told me that she did not realize that Mattie could be her friend too; since she was her sister. OMG, so tell me that is not going to make any moms heart melt.
Here I have my two girls crying, because they just want to be bestest of the best friends, and I’m fighting to hold back my tears. My husband walks in, looks at what is going on, doesn’t ask anything, and makes a beeline for the bedroom. When he notices I’m following him, he runs in the bathroom, and tells me he will be out in a second lol. I think he had to mentaly prepare for what he thought was going on. I’m really not sure what he thought was going on, but when I told him I could see a look of relief lol. I think I need to find a book for husband, and how to properly handle living in a house with 5 girl’s, and be mentally prepared for the unknown lol.
It’s easy to take your siblings for granted, because you are around them all the time. Sometimes you might even get sick of being around them. I try to teach my kids to value their relationship with one another, because when push comes to shove, and you feel like your world is falling apart if you have a healthy relationship with your siblings you will always have them to turn to, and nothing beats that. Like other parents I understand my kids are going to bicker. In the end I want them to understand how important they are to one another, and know that they will always have a eachother. Siblings are the best kinds of friends, they are the friends that should always be there, always forgive, and always love one another. I like that this book helped Vayda and Mattie understand how important their relationship with one another is.
Here is a great video so you can have a sneak peek children’s book A Little Book About Friends:
If you have a chance I definitely recommend reading A Little Book about Friendship. It’s a great book that can really get those young minds thinking, and learning what friendship is about, and how to handle those moments when we need to say we are sorry, or those moments when we need to learn how to forgive.